From $100k in Vegas to tears over hands: Daria Kurt's inner breakdown
Darya Kurt shared a candid story about how, in just a matter of weeks, she went from the peak of her career to the deepest psychological crisis. Only a couple of weeks after the best stretch of her career and a $100k win in Las Vegas, Darya Kurt felt like "a worm smeared on the asphalt." The contrast between a sense of complete, invincible superiority and the subsequent $15k August collapse hit her ego hard, making her doubt her own skill.
The main battle played out internally: with years of play at a 14 bb/100 winrate behind her, Darya sincerely came to believe that all her past success had been a fluke and that now "the truth had come out" about her weak level. The psychological pressure reached the point where, in tears, she asked Enigma fund head Anton Azharov to excuse her from the monthly submission of played hands — just so that nobody would see her mistakes and start judging her.
What helped break through this impostor syndrome was realizing one simple thing: in the middle of a deep downswing, the fear of public shame is more paralyzing than the variance itself. To regain control, Darya had to step over her shame, accept that downswings are inevitable for any regular, and force herself to take a break instead of frantically trying to win it back on emotion.
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The main battle played out internally: with years of play at a 14 bb/100 winrate behind her, Darya sincerely came to believe that all her past success had been a fluke and that now "the truth had come out" about her weak level. The psychological pressure reached the point where, in tears, she asked Enigma fund head Anton Azharov to excuse her from the monthly submission of played hands — just so that nobody would see her mistakes and start judging her.
What helped break through this impostor syndrome was realizing one simple thing: in the middle of a deep downswing, the fear of public shame is more paralyzing than the variance itself. To regain control, Darya had to step over her shame, accept that downswings are inevitable for any regular, and force herself to take a break instead of frantically trying to win it back on emotion.
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